About half way through the Oscars last night, I thought of the idea to do a play by play for the blog. But then I was too lazy to get my computer out for the second half. You'll just have to be happy with a recap.
Fun opening sequence. I appreciated Jon Stewart's dry sense of humor. Overall, I think he did a fine job, but I hafta say I'm partial to Billy Crystal. There's something about the Oscars when he does it.
I'll never see Westerns the same again after the first of the odd, unmotivated montages.
One word for George Clooney: suave. I think he's the new Cary Grant--he practically channeled him in Intollerable Cruelty. And about being out of touch. Yeah, yeah. Pushing the envelope on certain issues is good. But maybe not others. And who's to decide which ones? Me, of course.
****
OK I'm actually picking this up two days after the Oscars and after reading the Jolly Porter's take on it all. I know I can't measure up to his wit, but I'm gonna have my say nonetheless!
Here's to motherhood makin' women out of waifs!
Rachel Weisz (maybe not really so waifish, but gorgeous, glowing, and all around puh-fect! What an Oscar winner should be!)
Michelle Williams--bright canary, but ultimately, thumbs up.
Jennifer Garner--Did anyone see 13 Going on 30? Didn't think so. But she has this line where a girl tells her she's wearing a great dress and she says, "Cuz I've got these great boobs to fill it out!" Well, last night was the only time that statement was true. But maybe I'm bitter because now that I've all but weaned Moira, my sweet sistah's have shrivelled to their prepregnancy prepubescent state.
Dolly: What a little fire cracker! But I think I coulda bounced a quarter off her face.
Meryl and Lilly: amazing. That's why they get paid the big bucks. When I grow up, I want to be them.
The campaigns: Loads of fun. I loved "Keira: Acting while beautiful." and the old couple plugging Reese.
It's Hard Out Here Foe A Pimp: I'll say this for them: It's the only song I can still remember. And, yeah, let's get excited about winning an award. I know I would---Just gimme a chance!!!
Best Actor: Phillip was really mesmerizing and subtle (yes, subtle. I'll explain to anyone who wants to hear.) But couldn't we have done something about the caterpillars over his eyes?
Best Actress: I first saw Reese in a movie called "A Far Off Place." She was about 14 and I said to myself, "That girl has got it." She was charming in Walk The Line. Her hair was pretty, elegant, and feminine.
Best and Worst Dressed: Salma Hayak's dress was my favorite. Wow. Can I look like that, please??!! Naomi Watts was the worst. I think she'd been running through the jungle with Kong before coming on stage. A close second was the dead crow perched on Charlize's shoulder.
Oh, director and picture?? Thought I forgot, didn't you? Thought I was going to avoid the touchy subject of the Elephant in the room?
Did anyone notice that the Asian directed the gay American movie and the gay American directed the Asian movie? (OK, so I don't know Rob Marshall's orientation, but, c'mon! He directs musicals!)
Some have said that Crash is as pretentious and overrated as Titanic. I don't think anything could be as overrated as Titanic. Just didn't get that one. And while I liked Brokeback Mountain, it did not blow me away. I find that I could quit it quite easily. And Crash did affect me. It caused me to examine myself because it did hit me over the head.
And on to the Governor's Ball. What is up with E!'s reporters??!! I don't know which was more embarrassing. Julianne (is that her name?) revealing her girl crush on JLo. "You should see her when there's only a bush separating you." Did she really say that? OR That horrid E! Bailey's Bar Lounge thingy with a bunch of nobodies. Who wants to see nobodies on Oscar night?
One other fun moment was at the Vanity Fair party when Venus and Serena and their ARMS were interviewed. I don't know which is which, but one said her favorite winner was Phillip Semen Hoffmore.
That's a wrap. Good night, and Good Luck!
6 comments:
I'd like to know what you mean about PSH being subtle...
I just want to know why Jennifer Aniston won't wear color on her lips. This is getting ridiculous.
Amen, Carina. Her face is always a solid shade of fake tan. And why does she only wear black, uninteresting dresses? Dear Jen: you have, like, a gazillion dollars. Hire a new stylist already.
Excellent thoughts, Cotton! I need to see Crash so I can understand what all the hoopla's about.
I have it from a very reliable source (my 20-year-old assistant from Idaho farm country) that "Brokeback Mountain" (which I personally haven't seen) is highly inaccurate. When I asked her for a critique, the only thing she said about the movie was, "Sheeeeperds don't bathe, and they definitely don't shave while in the mountains!" So there you have it. Ha!
I know we are counseled not to compare ourselves with others and that we know in our heart-of-hearts the celebrities have problems like the rest of us, but here's the thing: I'd switch places with Rachel Weisz in a milisecond. She is lovely (not bombshell gorgeous, but luminous in a longer-lasting way)and has dark hair the color of 70% cocoa baking chocolate (I'll work on romanticizing that analogy another time). Her skin glows (even when she is not pregnant) and she has a perfect mouth. In addition to being beautiful, she is soft-spoken, but powerful, and polite and sweet. She'll probably be a terrific mother, and her kid will sleep throught the night at 6 weeks. She is woman I always wanted (OK, want) to be. Even if only for a day.
Think she'd trade? Nah, neither would I.
~j, I meant his character arch was subtle and all the crazy things he went through emotionally. I think maybe Capote thought he knew who he was and was comfortable with it and this experience changed and challenged it. In the end, after writing In Cold Blood, he was not the same person. Or, at least, he was no longer ok with who he thought he was. I just got my April Premier and they've done the "100 Greatest Performances of All Time." (They're always so full of themselves. But do read the article on Jon Heder.) PSH's Capote was chosen as one of those and the magazine remarked, "Hoffman disappears below layers of artifice to become the writer of In Cold Blood, using his voice, his carriage, his mannerisms--and the result lays bare the man's core of self-loathing glossed over with vanity. As Capote burrows into the sordid truths of other people's lives and deaths, Hoffman opens up the man's little rages and silent torments. Utterly convincing during the peaks of Truman's gadfly persona, Hoffman also reveals his cutting brilliance during quiet moments with Harper Lee. And when Truman goes off the grid into catatonic despair, Hoffman provokes sympathy and contempt in equal measure."
Anyway, the more I think about it, the more I am amazed by this performance.
carina, I didn't notice the lips so much as the look of surprised confusion, or is it confused surprise, that she always wears in every movie.
paranoid, I did like Corpse Bride but thought it rather predictable. I did actually prefer Wallace and Gromit. Oh, well, to each his own!
mom to 3, Yes, but who'd wanna watch Heath and Jake gettin' it on all dirty and scruffy. No thanks! I'll take my homosexuality clean shaven.
bree, Someday I will meet Rachel and we can all be best friends together.
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